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Thrive Instead of Survive During a Crisis

I was living overseas in Frankfurt when 9/11 happened. I will never forget where I was and what I was doing at that time. Watching those pictures on my computer at work is ingrained in my memory forever. A flood of thoughts and emotions rolled over me afterwards. I was worried about my friends and family. I no longer felt safe. I was worried about reactions, further attacks and security worldwide. In reality I was far from the tragedy, but in my mind and heart I felt both very close and touched by it, and yet very far from my loved ones and my country. That is a very common reaction to crisis when living overseas. Another common reaction is the desire to “go home.” Although Germany was a safer place to live post 9/11, I still heard a voice inside trying to convince me that “home” was safer. I have been thinking a lot about those feelings during this current crisis.

While many of us have lived through crises and economic downturns before, I think we can agree that COVID-19 presents unique challenges we haven’t faced before. Widespread social isolation and working from home has become the new norm.

It is easy to feel overwhelmed by the news, the continual changes to our daily lives, worries about the safety of our families and friends, and the fear of being laid off.

We are all experiencing a collective sense that we are not in control of our lives. I am here to tell you that while you may not be able to control everything that is happening around you, you are in charge of how you choose to respond and you can take measures that will enable you to be resilient and even THRIVE during these difficult times.

The primitive part of your brain can hamper your ability to think, analyze, evaluate, and plan during a crisis. Unlike our animal ancestors, we have a part of our brain called the cerebral cortex that enables us to think, evaluate, organize, and plan our actions. But when faced with a crisis, are we really so different from those creatures lower down the evolutionary ladder?

When early man was faced with a crisis, such as a saber-toothed tiger, the amygdala processed this life-threatening information instantly, bypassed our higher-order thinking ability, and immediately triggered emotional, psychological, and physical changes that mobilized action in the name of SURVIVAL.

Now this reaction may still be useful when confronted by a mugger in the dark. But the changes produced in our brain and body are less effective for managing many of the crises we are facing these days.

Many of us fall victim to a crisis mentality because it’s our natural instinct. By working to instill what I call an “opportunity mindset,” you will increase your awareness of constructive forks in the road and the probability that you will move forward as you face this crisis.

An appropriate definition of SURVIVAL for modern times may be: the ability to get by or maintain the status quo despite challenging conditions.

Whereas to THRIVE means: “to prosper; be fortunate or successful; to grow or develop vigorously; flourish.” In other words, to want to feel better, do better, and live better.

This disruption of your daily routine offers you a unique opportunity to break unhealthy habits that were too difficult to overcome while you were entrenched in your life before the COVID-19 crisis. Your eating habits are one such area in which you are forced to change. If you had a habit of stopping by that donut shop on the way to work, you no longer can. If you got that latte at Starbucks every day at lunch, sorry. 

Here’s a good exercise for you to engage in to see which bad habits you can break while in “lockdown.”

  1. Identify one or two habits you wish you didn’t have (e.g., snacking on junk food whenever you take a break).
  2. Clarify why you want to break the habit (e.g., causes you to overeat and gain weight).
  3. Specify a new habit with which you can replace the old habit (e.g., instead of eating when you take a break while working at home, take a walk around the block).
  4. Create an enjoyable environment for your new habit (e.g., listen to music or podcasts or talk to friends by phone during your walk).
  5. Accept that you might fall off the wagon periodically, so just recommit to the new habit and get back on the wagon (e.g., if, in a moment of weakness, you ate a bag of potato chips, resist the urge to buy chips the next time you are grocery shopping).
  6. Seek support for your new habit (e.g., if you have a spouse or roommate working from home as well, ask them to help you by not buying snacks themselves and joining you for your walks).
  7. Choose a reward for staying committed (e.g., treat yourself to a nice relaxing bubble bath).

There is no way that we can completely turn the COVID-19 crisis into a thoroughly positive experience. At the same time, to allow it to be totally negative adds insult to the injury that’s already being inflicted on us. Instead, see the pandemic as an opportunity to exert positive forces on your life and make healthy changes. You garner several important benefits from taking this approach to the crisis. First, you’ll feel a lot better psychologically and emotionally during a time that is a natural downer because you are using your time and energy in a constructive way. Second, the pandemic will go by faster because you’re focused on more positive things. And, lastly, when the crisis finally passes, you can take the new changes and enter the “real world” happier and better positioned to enjoy your life to the fullest. Get a plan, get a focus, put some energy in. I want you to imagine two months from now saying, we went through this crisis and I utilized it and now I’m better because of it. I lost weight. I quit drinking. I got in shape. I wrote my book. I am better and the world is better because I focused my brain on what I could do and how I could help and be part of the solution.

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