What you think of yourself is what generates or depletes self-confidence. Confidence is a FEELING, and self-confidence is a FEELING about the self. All of our FEELINGS are going to come from our thinking, so the way we think about ourselves will determine whether or not we FEEL confident.
All humans are capable and amazing, just by virtue of being human. Therefore, a self-confident person is going to think they are good, capable and worthy. This doesn’t have to be proven for a specific situation, or true all the time to create the FEELING. Just by being human, you are capable and worthy.
So why aren’t all humans self-confident? We don’t trust ourselves. We don’t understand how to manage our minds, so we FEEL out of control. This leads us to let ourselves down regularly, which undermines our ability to trust ourselves.
We are afraid of FEELING our emotions, especially negative ones. So we hide and avoid them. This leaves us scared to do anything that has the risk of failure. We question our ability because we have to do it perfectly or we will FEEL negative emotion.
Our opinion of ourselves is low. We don’t spend a lot of time thinking highly of ourselves. Our brains are programmed to see what’s wrong, so that’s what it’s always seeking. It finds negative thoughts that create negative FEELINGS, which is the opposite of self-confidence.
Self-confidence is practiced self-belief. Beliefs are thoughts you think over and over.
Increasing self-confidence comes from changing your thoughts about yourself. One way you can start building your self-confidence is by recognizing that you are an amazing human. One step towards this goal is to create an accomplishment log. You can list little things and big things you have accomplished. The point is to acknowledge everything you have done that you once hadn’t done or couldn’t do.
Examples: Graduated from high school, married my husband, bought my first house, started my own business, learned to crochet, etc.
Keep adding to your accomplishment log and review it carefully to help you realize what an amazing human you are.
Once you’ve realized all that you have and can accomplish, why not add to your list of accomplishments by trying something new and joining me in my Dare of the Day challenge? When you do something new, the FEEL good chemical, dopamine, is released.
Here are the ‘Dare of the Day’ rules:
- Pick one thing per day that scares you, and do it.
- It has to be something that requires you to ‘get over a fear’.
- Write about it before and after.
- Try to complete a dare as many days as possible for the rest of this month.
- Don’t violate the COVID safety precautions or other laws where you are living.
If you commit to doing this now, you will not be as likely to back out when the day comes. So choose to do this to get good at being self-confident.
FEEL free to share your dares and to follow my dares on Facebook and Instagram at XPatLifeCoaching. I dare you.