There are times in life when our greatest challenge is to forgive ourselves. We pay a very high price for refusing to take responsibility for our experience: the price of not being able to change it. It is important to own our mistakes in order to learn from them.
Our brains typically go to self-hatred when we make mistakes. Our brain doesn’t really care who we’re attacking as long as we’re attacking someone. First we try to blame, but if that doesn’t work, we turn to beating ourselves up. Our thoughts lead us initially to do the wrong thing, and then punish us savagely for having done so.
When we’ve done wrong, we should look open-eyed, even teary-eyed, at exactly what we did and why we did it. Grown-ups own up to our mistakes, and grow from them.
Often our character defects are simply the coping mechanisms of the frightened child, the fragile heart, in all of us.
The only antidote to self-hatred is self-respect, and self-respect can come only when we know we’re doing everything possible to be better people now.
You can develop a mindset to think of all the mistakes we make in life as teaching moments, a treasured source of challenge.
If you would like to continue this work with me, then schedule a free trial coaching session.
If you want to stop focusing on what you’ve given up and start creating the life you desire abroad, then contact me now.
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