The coaching tool I use most often with myself and with my clients is a problem solving method that is great for breaking free of indecision, among other uses. It is based in cognitive psychology, and many coaches and self-help gurus use some version of it. OTRDI is one of the acronyms for it.
Objective. Breaking things down to just the facts. Facts don’t carry emotion with them, and they don’t hurt. For example, I have moved to a new country.
Thoughts. This is your personal interpretation about the objective facts. What does this mean for you? Sometimes this is the story we are telling ourselves about the circumstance. For example, the people are not friendly here, the food is horrible, the healthcare is not good, and the country is awful. While these may feel like facts, not everyone in the world would likely agree to them, so they are actually the thoughts in your head about the situation. For more clarification of objective facts and thoughts, check out my blogpost on Separating Fact from Story.
Reflective. How you feel about it. Emotions or feelings. Try to sum it up in one word, like, frustrated. An important thing to realize is that objective facts are neutral and don’t cause any feelings in us, until we have a thought about them. It is our thoughts that drive our feelings. For more clarification about how your reflective feelings fit into this model, read my blogpost on Feelings.
Decisional. Or action. Identify the next step to do today, and the next step to do tomorrow. For example, when you are feeling frustrated because you are thinking this country is awful, your actions tend towards staying in and avoiding interaction with the country and its people, and actively looking for all the ways the country and its people are not friendly. Read my blogpost on Actions for further information.
Impact. Accomplishments. The results you are creating in your life by your decisions and actions that are driven by your thoughts and feelings. You are quite literally creating the results in your life by how you think. Check out my blockpost on Results to explore this more deeply.
You can use the OTRDI tool to understand better why you are creating your current impact or results. You can analyze the thoughts you are generating about your current circumstances, and decide if they are helping you make the impact you want. Awareness is always the first step towards living the life you desire.
For example, one of my clients who moved abroad for her husband was thinking that her new country was awful and the people were unfriendly. This caused her to feel frustrated. This generated decisions and actions that had her staying home alone and when she did go out, looking for proof for all the ways she was right and the country was awful and the people unfriendly. The impact was her time in her new country was miserable, she wanted to leave, and she was resenting her husband for the move.
You can also use this OTRDI model in reverse and start with the result or impact you want to create in your life. Then ask yourself what decisions or actions could you take to help create that impact. Then ask yourself, “How would you have to feel in order to take those decisions and actions?” Then ask yourself what thoughts could you think to help you feel that way? Make sure to take the time to identify the objective facts in the situation too, in order to obtain clarity.
For example, you could decide your impact will be that you make the most of your time abroad. Then you could generate a list of decisions and actions that will help you make the most of your time, such as seeing the sights, meeting new people, learning the local customs, trying all the local foods, and learning the local language. Then you ask yourself how you would need to feel in order to do all those things, perhaps adventurous. Then you could generate a helpful thought that creates the feeling of adventure for you, such as, “I want to live my life to the fullest.” Remind yourself of the facts, such as, you are living in a new country, and that is neither good nor bad, but neutral. Try to be an explorer, an anthropologist, and investigate all the good and bad that is wrapped up in this new adventure. Every place, including the last place, and your home country, has both good and bad elements.
If you would like to continue this work with me, then schedule a free trial coaching session.
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