CULTURES include assumptions, values, expectations, and attitudes that have developed among groups of people over time. No matter where in the world you are, and no matter how open-minded you are as a person, there will inevitably be times when your own values, expectations, and habits clash with those of the local people.
As a guest in their country, you can take on the responsibility for reaching out as best you can and trying to accommodate to the CULTURE around you. You can work to bridge the gap between your own CULTURE and theirs by increasing your knowledge in the following areas:
- Realizing that people in other places have developed different ways of dealing with life.
- Familiarizing yourself with your own CULTURALLY based values, expectations and attitudes, rather than taking them for granted.
- Studying the specific attitudes, expectations, and values of the CULTURE around you.
- Learning how to interact with people in another CULTURE based on an understanding of their point of view, whether or not you agree with it or adopt it yourself.
What is considered ‘common sense’ in one CULTURE may make no sense at all to people who grew up somewhere else.
It is an eye opening experience to talk to people who immigrated to your home country about what they found strange or difficult to adjust to in your home CULTURE, or to read books that describe your own CULTURE. It will help you understand what people in other countries might find surprising and unusual about you.
I also found it helpful to read about your host CULTURE and study the language. Interact with as many people as you can as everyone from your neighbor, the sales clerk, to fellow expats will all have something to teach you about the CULTURE. All you need is a willingness to reach out and observe.
Learning to interact with local people based on an understanding of their point of view, whether or not you agree with it or adopt it yourself can be a delicate task. It may require you to suppress many of your own reactions and hold back criticism of things that appear nonsensical or ‘wrong.’ Like you, the local people have been raised to think that their way of doing things is the best way. An attitude of superiority will get you nowhere fast.
I prefer to approach your host CULTURE with curiosity, observing without judgement through an anthropologist’s eye. Look for all the wondrous ways this new place is different. Some things you may eventually want to adopt, and some not. Regardless you will certainly open up to new experiences and learn from new situations instead of continuously being disappointed when they don’t measure up to your home country expectations.
You will feel the urge to vent complaints about the host country. This is natural. Watch out that you don’t make complaining an ongoing habit, or you will start creating a bitter, unpleasant life overseas. Remember that your thoughts create your reality. If you are spending most of your time focusing on all the ways the country is inferior, you will convince yourself the country is not for you and find nothing but evidence to support this view. Therefore, be sure to spend time consciously looking for good, interesting and unusual things about your new country. This will help you create a better overall expat experience.
Your efforts to understand the CULTURE can ultimately lead to personal growth. Your own way of thinking will be broadened by your exposure to different points of view, whether or not you ultimately find them convincing. Serving as a good example of tolerance and understanding is one of the best roles expatriates can play in the world.
Tourists pay thousands of dollars for a brief glimpse of the exotic sights, traditions and customs of a foreign country. An expats’ experience, which can be so much richer, broader and deeper, should therefore be priceless.
Some aspects of your new CULTURE will be endearing and you will adopt them. Some you will miss when you leave. The extensive knowledge you will gain of your host CULTURE, and your cross-cultural communication skills will stay with you and may permanently change the way you view the world.
Confronting a new CULTURE and learning to live in a strange new environment may be one of the greatest challenges you will ever face. As you rise to the challenge, you will find yourself changing, adapting, and growing. Before you realize it, you will become a seasoned citizen of the world.