According to Wikipedia HOMESICKNESS is the distress caused by being away from home. It’s hallmark symptom is preoccupying thoughts of home and attachment objects. Sufferers typically report a combination of depressive and anxious symptoms, withdrawn behaviour and difficulty focusing on topics unrelated to home.
I moved to Berlin at the beginning of August and felt my first symptoms of HOMESICKNESS leading up to American Thanksgiving. It was perfectly timed with the onslaught of a gray, cold, Berlin winter. I become obsessed with everything I was missing out on; family celebrations, turkey, stuffing, cranberry sauce, pumpkin pies, etc. In fact a lot of my attachment objects were related to food, most of which was not very healthy either. I really just wanted to stay in bed all day and mope about missing my family’s Thanksgiving, which was just a regular Thursday in Berlin.
Thankfully one of my friends came to visit and pulled me out of my slump. She found Berlin super exciting and was constantly marvelling at the bullet holes in buildings that were historical evidence. She convinced me to cook a Thanksgiving dinner with whatever we could find and make from scratch, and to invite my husband’s friends from university to indoctrinate them into traditional Thanksgiving. We still laugh at the most expensive turkey ever, which we named Tiffany Turkey. We giggle over how we had to put the side dishes into self-made foil wrappers to shove on the sides of the turkey as the turkey itself just barely fit into my tiny European oven. Basically we had a great time that we look back on fondly to this day. I’m so thankful that she pulled me out of my HOMESICKNESS funk.
You shouldn’t ignore HOMESICKNESS. You should allow yourself to feel it. But you should also realize that the cause of HOMESICKNESS are the thoughts you are thinking. When you obsess over the tiniest things that you left behind, you negate all the amazing new things that are there for you to discover. When you start to glorify the life you left behind, it stops resembling your actual life. Most likely you were bored, tired, lonely, angry and resentful at times in your home country. So don’t be surprised that you have those same feelings at times in your new country.
Allow yourself to feel HOMESICKNESS, feel free to look for groups of people that are from the same country as you, but put on your explorer self, and look for all the amazing new things to discover and try in your new country too.
Yes, things in your new country are different. But different doesn’t mean something negative. The reason why you are feeling HOMESICK is because of a thought you’re thinking – it’s not actually because of where you are. Decide today that you are going to live in the moment, and not in your past. Decide today that you will make the most of this adventure you have embarked upon. Decide today to learn about the history of your new country, the geography, the language, the social norms. Put on your scientist hat and try to objectively learn everything you can about where you are now without judgement.
According to Google a word that is the opposite of HOMESICK is wanderlust. And wanderlust means a strong desire to wander or travel and explore the world. Instead of keeping your thoughts in the past in your home country, put them into exploring your current home country and developing your sense of wanderlust.
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